On Dressing Like A Children's Entertainer

Clothes seem frivolous and unimportant a lot of the time (especially given Current Larger World Events). I respect people for whom the things they put on their body are unimportant to them, but I’ve always cared quite a lot about what I wear.

As a very sassy little girl, I wore colourful, mismatched outfits. In a school photo with my siblings, I am sporting a garish glittery scarf which I refused to take off for the picture. Teenage angst and caring too much about the opinions of largely indifferent males meant a preoccupation with the skinniest jeans. There was also a questionable phase as a young teenager where I dressed a bit like a mum, in Ugg boots and cardigans with weird little scarves.

It has only been more recently when I care a bit less about what other people think, or value my body for more than its relative thinness, that I have embraced baggy jeans and men’s shirts and colourful jumpers. The clothes that make me feel happy, or comfortable, or sexy, have little to do with what make me look more attractive to men now. My bodycon dress days are over- and they never looked that good anyway.

I think fashion is joyful. When I’m wearing clothes I love, I feel like myself. On rainy days or when I feel sad, I wear the most colours possible. It gives off an energy which is less fashionista and more children’s entertainer- but that’s an energy there should be more of in the world, in my opinion.

Growing awareness about the issues surrounding fast fashion and cheap clothing (more on that another time) has shifted me, as with so many others, away from big shops and towards charity shopping, vintage sales and Depop. This is (as has been noted) a privileged thing, to have the time to rifle through racks of uncool granny clothes to find some cool granny clothes, or the money to buy overpriced second hand sports jackets, or to be able to find vintage clothes in your size. But- what a good feeling when you find something just right! Something which looks like it has a story, or is a bit weird, or is just a bargain.

Many clear outs, re-thinks and hours in Oxfam have meant that I think more about what I want to wear. This is not to say that I’m especially stylish or edgy, but that I just enjoy getting dressed in the morning, knowing that I’m wearing something I chose- especially when it involves lots of colours and the baggiest jeans.